↓ Transcript
Customer: You have to upgrade MS Office on my laptop.
Technician: Okay, hand it over & I'll take a look.

(Pink "OMG 9000" laptop, with "Stickers!" "Glitter!" "Suspicious stains!" labels radiating off it)

Technician: This isn't a company-owned device. I'm not allowed to touch it and we're not licenced for personal devices.
Customer: But I use it to do work on at home sometimes!

Technician: (glasses turned red and eyebrows down-turned in annoyance) No.